Psychic Predictions for the Upcoming Year.

[baltoro]

....I know,...I know,...you're thinking: 'Why are psychics ALWAYS WRONG?'   

(I don't know,...maybe Dave does,...) But, given their historical record of complete ineptitude, I think all psychics that publish predictions that turn out to be FALSE, should get a complimentary Darwin Award. (...even Elvis agrees with me on this,...).

...Anyway, this is the OFFICIAL MASM Psychic Predictions for 2010 thread, and I think the correct approach should be:
...to come up with the most ridiculous, unscientific, and outrageous statements ever seen on an Internet forum.
That way, the probability is high that someone will get one right (if you ARE actually psychic, then you understand my 'thinking' on this).   

...and, DON'T CHEAT! It is unacceptable to predict that, 'Rush Limbaugh will get more death threats than the President',...   
or,...'Reality TV will be ALOT more exciting this year',...or, that 'this year's Britney Spears' concert Tour will gross over a Hundred Million Dollars, worldwide'.
That kind of stuff is ludicrous and pathetic, and more importantly, outlaw hedge fund managers cannot factor such nebulous concepts into their computer models,...

There are NO RULES, really,...except,...

Make predictions that can be verified empirically. Have it Notarized. Have it tattooed on your ass.   

The future of humanity may well depend upon your revelations.

[baltoro]

...Here is my prediction:   

I predict that looting celebrity estates will become a wildly popular religious cult.

In fact, in California it will become an unstoppable juggernaut (it will be bigger than Gravity), and there will be so many organized religious looters that they will be required to hold press conferences and take out full page advertisements in the Los Angeles Times,
declaring: the Target celebrity (with Mug Shot) and current itinerary, the preliminary time frame, satellite reconnaissance photos with arrows and sticky notes and perp approaches indicated in red, and, of course, a note of approval from Mom. Many looters will have their escapades documented by rogue Film Crews. The cops will provide security escorts and actually get some credit for making arrests.
Martial Law will be declared. Hundreds of thousands of starving refugees will arrive from all over the world to join in the fun. The media will go absolutely berserk. Paris Hilton will get so many lucrative Television and Movie offers, that she will run for Governor and win in a landslide. Her first official act will be to legalize celebrity looting (permits required), and declare California a Federal Disaster Zone.

[redskull]

Java programmers accidentally and unwittingly program a devastating, self-aware computer virus that wrecks the world communications infrastructure.  As the only ones knowledgeable enough to fix it, the active members of MASM32 forum save humanity on condition of being declared absolute rulers of earth.  All poverty and war solved within 6 weeks, but internal power struggles regarding meaningless cycle counts spirals out of control, sending earth into a new dark age.  Corrupt politicians take over again, and everything back to normal by 2011.  :8)

-r

[jj2007]

All poverty and war solved within 6 weeks, but internal power struggles regarding meaningless cycle counts ...

I am pretty sure we can do it in 5 weeks, provided Lingo is available :green

[dedndave]

i predict the "carry flag" will be set   ::)

[rags]

Or did you mean "Carrie flag"  Dave?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carrie_%28film%29

[dedndave]

lol Rags
i had something more like this in mind...



notice how the short guys are on the end
the tall guys don't look all that tall, either - lol

i also like how they are marching through the parking lot of a townhouse - lol
you won't see these guys on main street

[hutch--]

I supported Paris Hilton for president, she has good legs and daddies money. Not that there is anything wrong with Obama, he was handed the poisoned chalice after G.W.Dumbphuk and has taken much of the bitter pill out of it.

While we are at it, for the next elections around the world, Sego for President in France, Tszipi Livni to roll Benny at the next election in Israel, Yulia Tymoshenko to becomes the next president of the recombined new soviet and a continuation of the good looking blonde in ARgentina.

Then we can have a Newer World Order of government sponsorship for cheaper nylon stockings, lipstick discounts and an end to the anal retentive bullshit we all have been hearing for years.  :bg

[Farabi]

PS3 bllue-ray will be hijacked on China and all the PS3 on indonesia would be installed with a self de-encryption mod-chip, this should save humanity from war and poverty ( because Im too bussy with the game)

[sinsi]

>government sponsorship for cheaper nylon stockings, lipstick discounts
Is there something you want to tell us hutch?  :bg

I predict that dave will 1)become an x64 guru and 2)will break 10,000 posts.

[hutch--]

 :bg

> Is there something you want to tell us hutch?

Nah but if you keep the girls happy there is less noise in the world.

[oex]

The world will become entirely virtualised

[vanjast]

If you want some amusing enlightenment (and hardcore truths) - I'm reading 'God is not great' by Christoher Hitchens.

[dedndave]

I predict that dave will 1)become an x64 guru and 2)will break 10,000 posts

Sinsi - the idea is to pick something that might actually happen - lol

[baltoro]

Ha, Ha.   
You guys are naturals. But,...I'm worried,...
I should have specified that all responses be posted in 'binary'. I'd be willing to bet that Paris Hilton has a huge legal staff that does nothing except search the Internet for inflammatory and derogatory statements about their client.
I fear that some really ugly litigation is imminent.
However, once her business advisors actually 'think' about the convoluted plot to catapult her into the political stratosphere, (and she realizes that it will be majorly fun campaigning in her bikini)...I'm pretty sure she'll hire a bunch of demented political operatives and just-out-of-rehab ghostwriters to do a script treatment (on spec), to shop around to the major studios,...and, for which she will, by default, get the starring role. 
...I need to find a specialist (a vicious, hard-core, Dave-like bare-knuckles negotiator) that can get me my margies before the Major Studios get their sleazy, in-house lawyers into the project.   

...Other than that, I've got to point out that redskull's prediction is entirely plausible, especially:   

"All poverty and war solved within 6 weeks, but internal power struggles regarding meaningless cycle counts spirals out of control, sending earth into a new dark age."

This has the timeless ring of TRUTH to it. I'm absolutely CERTAIN it will happen,...

...Still trying to decode dednDave's response,...I'm sure he's right,...I just don't understand what he's right about. But, I've alerted my Broker,...and I'm sure all the investment bankers on Wall Street have their spy networks on code red,...ready to surge into a brutal 'Black Friday' trading frenzy, the moment we know what the HELL is going through his mind,...

...and,...Hutch, you have world-class political instincts,...
...Your succinct wrap-up of current world affairs, this is probably the best all-around characterization of modern political developments that I've read in the last couple of decades,...

Not that there is anything wrong with Obama, he was handed the poisoned chalice after G.W.Dumbphuk and has taken much of the bitter pill out of it.