Trick Question of the Day

[baltoro]

This is hypothetical,...you don't have to be an American to get in on the fun.
If you were a candidate for President of the United States,...what would your official platform be ???
...Anything goes,...

[anunitu]

If I ran, I would prob come up with crazy stuff like some teabaggers, you know big time conspiresy stuff. Then when everyone kept seeing it on the media,I make my move and write a book, and get a reality show,and make Millions!!!!!
MUHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dedndave]

probably not a viable platform, but the first thing i'd do....
take back all the money that cheney and halliburton have swiped   :P
i am sure that running on that as a platform would get you "disappeared"

[baltoro]

...I must confess,...I have sinister and ulterior (but, patriotic) motives,...
Just in case, I DO decide to run for President (...on Hutch's recommendation),...I need some innovative thinking,...

...The best I've come up with so far is:
FOOLS !!! IT'S COMPLETELY HOPELESS !!!
MOVE TO AUSTRALIA !!!

...So, ANUNITU and DAVE,...you won't object if I blantantly steal your stuff,... :eek
(both of which are light years ahead of anything I could possibly dream up)

...But, seriously,...what I really need are some EPIC mission impossible type conspiracy theories to make all the Republicans crazy,...
...I'm thinking along the lines of: putting all the corrupt Goldman-Sachs executives in charge of The Federal Reserve, The Treasury Department, the Securities and Exchange Commission,  The Strategic Petroleum Reserve, CIA covert operations in all OPEC countries,...pool parties at Area 51,..and. of course, fundraising for my illustrious campaign,...
...And, maybe,...outsourcing all my Foreign Policy decisions to Charlie Sheen and/or Paris Hilton (or, her pets),...
...HOW COULD IT GET MUCH WORSE,...???

[hutch--]

YEAH YEAH, Paris for Vice President, you need some good legs in the campaign.

[vanjast]

My platform...
First policy ... Self Preservation - make sure all are OK/happy within the borders (a hard task but you have to start somewhere)
Second policy ... A new foreign policy of assistance, without meddling, and for that matter invading!!  :green2
Third policy ... Free Beer with Paris on each bottle  :P This should go down well
:bg

[zemtex]

I would try to do something about the food industry in america. Over half the population is overweight. It have become such a big problem that airplanes need to count one person as two in order to avvoid an airplane stall.

I would restructure everything in the food industry, find ways to squeeze out fast food, enforce laws to ensure that healthy food is cheap and accessible.

OFF-TOPIC: I would ban elevators in all skyscrapers to force them to take the walk.  :bdg

[vanjast]

.. It have become such a big problem that airplanes need to count one person as two .....

The plus side of this will be that we get a much larger seat that us 'lighter gravity challenged' folk will finally be able to sit comfortably in.
:bg

[MichaelW]

The food industry is essentially a symptom of the real problem. They couldn't make a profit from that junk if people were not stupid enough to eat it, in large quantities.

[hutch--]

Overweight people and poverty go hand in hand in most of the western world. More affluent people can usually afford to eat properly where folks on the bottom end of the pile often have little other choice than to eat trash. Being the target of advertising pressures does not help either. get a BIG MAC attack, greasy Kentucky Fried Chicken or anything full of trans fatty acids and you are on your way to being a balloon. We live in a generation where some parents will outlive their kids due to crap food.

[vanjast]

Nah.. The wiff and I are very strict on food and junk food is a 'luxury' here, very few and far between.
:)

[DarkWolf]

If you were a candidate for President of the United States,...what would your official platform be ???
...Anything goes,...

Annex Mexico as the 51 state.
They get their American Rights, we get cheap labor and keep them from jumping the fence.

pool parties at Area 51

Sssh, that's are secret undeground fishing resort. Why do you think they paved over Groom Lake ?

[anunitu]

I would try to do something about the food industry in america. Over half the population is overweight. It have become such a big problem that airplanes need to count one person as two in order to avvoid an airplane stall.

I would restructure everything in the food industry, find ways to squeeze out fast food, enforce laws to ensure that healthy food is cheap and accessible.

OFF-TOPIC: I would ban elevators in all skyscrapers to force them to take the walk.  :bdg

The thing is concerninng the food, the contaminated food with e-coli going around will kill us off faster than we can gain weight.
I worry more about food safty than if it is good or bad in the sense of nutrition. Weight you can lose if you really want to, and I do take issue with the idea of regulating what people can or cannot consume. So many people seem to think the world would be so much better by banning things. Usually those things are the very problem things the people who want to ban them have a problem resisting. Prohabition wasn't passed by social moderate drinkers, it was passed by the folkes who CAN'T handle any consumption of
alcohol. 

[baltoro]

There are so many possibilities here. :eek
I think that I would:

• OUTLAW SEX,...just to see if anybody was paying attention.
• And, if nobody was paying attention (my prevailing theory),...I'd introduce all kinds of outrageous stuff.
• For instance,...I would throw everybody in jail, unitl all of our troops came home from both Afghanistan and Iraq.
• All the investment bankers and hedge fund operators that made obscene amounts of money from the Financial Disaster of 2008 would be required to undergo non-elective brain surgery.
• And, I would outlaw all petroleum imports to the United States, just to encourage Renewable Energy, pedestrians, and cowboys.
• And, I would introduce new Cabinet level positions for Dave, Vanjast, and Anunitu; Secretary of Deporting Dick Cheney to One of Saturn's Moons, Secretary of Cosmic Zeitgeist, and, Secretary of Mind Control, Pool Parties and Other Ever-Popular Depraved Technologies, respectively,...

...But, don't worry,...I'm NOT running for President,...
...And, that. is a pragmatic issue,...I'd be assassinated with 2 milliseconds of taking office,...

[vanjast]

I'm in.. I'm in (punches the air)..  Now that I'm a politician of good standing... Anybody looking for 'underhand favours'... everything has a price!

Ahhh!! the good life.