Wan't the best for my mother

[Magnum]

I want the best for my mother, who has State 2 Alzheimers.

She is being abusive to me on occasion and seems happy sharing private things about me to strangers,
which makes it harder for me to take care of my mom.

I have to do recovery control with her care givers.  :U

I live in Texas, and my brother, who has power of attorney, lives in California.

WARNING........

Sorry for the upcoming language.

But sh_t, It's FiretrUCKing hard right now.

Just wanted to vent,
                                  Andy

[oex]

and seems happy sharing private things about me to strangers,

I think all mothers are happy sharing private things about their children to strangers :lol.... Dont let it get you down :bg

[Magnum]

I am trying.

You are right and there is a lot of wisdom in that.

My mom has been through a lot, my younger brother died in her house 5 years ago, etc.

Andy

[tbohon]

I lost my mother to cancer when I was 22 but ended up dealing with my ex-wife's mother who had Alzheimer's as well as my current mother-in-law. 

It's tougher on the families than it is on the patients, believe me.  Your mom isn't doing this 'sharing' because she wants to be mean - often these patients don't have any concept of who they're talking to or what they're saying.  Example:  my mother-in-law, who is 89, thinks that she's a teenager again and keeps calling up wanting her sister's phone number.  Try as we might we can't convince her that her sister - my wife's aunt - died almost 65 years ago.  And when we go to visit her she's constantly talking about her job there (at the resident facility) and how hard it is to get up the hill in all the snow.  We can't convince her that we seldom have snow here, there is no hill within 5 or 6 miles and she doesn't work there in any capacity ... so we just respond non-commitedly and she soon moves on to a different topic.

The bottom line, at least from my perspective, is that Alzheimer's patients are actually reasonably happy.  They live in a comfortable place of their own choosing - in my mother-in-law's case it's back when she was a teenager living at home and sneaking out to go to Seattle to visit friends and go to a movie - and up until the end stage disease there is no pain or discomfort.  That is about the only 'positive' (if that's the word) to this terrible disease.

My advice (for what it's worth):  be patient with your mother and focus on enjoying what time you can spend with her.  Alzheimer's will eventually take her life, there is no way around that.  Try to connect with her as much as you can - from observation I'm convinced that there is still a spark of 'her' inside the seemingly empty shell the disease turns them into.

My best wishes and good thoughts coming your way.

Tom

[Magnum]

Thanks for your advice.

Andy